Mark Bowden is an expert in human behaviour and body language. His bestselling books include the bestselling Winning Body Language; Winning Body Language for Sales Professionals ; and Tame the Primitive Brain – 28 Ways in 28 Days to Manage the Most Impulsive Behaviors at Work. Bowden originally received a university degree in performance in the UK, and studied the gesture-control methods of Jacques Lecoq’s Laboratory of Movement in Paris. He then went on to work with leading practitioners of movement psychology, building upon the influence techniques of Dr. Milton Erickson. When we met up in Toronto, he explained to me how the ancient survival instincts of our brain wire us to interpret gesture, and what this means for the future of both human communication and also the design of machines that can understand and relate to us.
It’s not about you – it’s about them!
The focus of an influencer is always on the audience.
If you are a speaker – it’s about the people listening to you.
If you are in sales – it’s about your customer or prospect.
If you are a leader – it’s about the people you are leading.
If you are a teacher – it’s about your students.
If you are a parent – it’s about your children
Almost everyone has this backwards. They think being influential means they need to become polished or powerful. Influence, though, is all about the audience. Be it an audience of one or one thousand. When it’s about them, they get it, and we grow in their eyes.
By thinking out instead of in, by concentrating on others instead of on us, a tremendous transformation takes place. We go from inner directed to outer directed, from taker to giver, from self-centered to others-focused, from tightfisted to generous, from shortsighted to farsighted, from selfish to selfless. We begin to see and act on behalf of others’ needs ahead of our own; our thoughts are in terms of “we” instead of “me.”
Ok, maybe wrong is not the right word. But the rule is incomplete. The truth is, people do business with people they know, like, trust and VALUE.
Honesty and likeability are important, but if people don’t see you as valuable, they will never do business with you. If you don’t come across as professional, knowledgeable, and credible with the right skill set to get the job done, you will never be as influential and successful as you would like.
So what do we do about it? How do we make ourselves more valuable? By constantly developing our knowledge, our skills and continually striving to get better. The fundamental rule of Business should read: “People do business
with people they know, like, trust and value”
Reputation is your track record. It is confidence in character and capability over time. Henry Ford said, “You can’t build a reputation on what you are going to do,” so reputation only comes after you make the investment. Lasting influence is built and sustained by reputation. People can be influential in a given situation, or for a temporary period of time, but lasting influence is based in reputation. That is why it is so important to guard your reputation, cultivate your reputation, and be a person of character and ever-increasing capability.
New Between Two Worlds Podcast Episode - Mike Walsh
Andy Stalman is an expert in launching and nurturing brands in Latin America. Author of “Brandoffon. Branding the Future” and CEO of Cato Partners Europe & LatAm, he also lectures as a visiting professor at a number of business schools and companies worldwide. We have spoken and shared meals together a number of times, from Bogota to Madrid, and I was keen to get his views on the challenges of engaging Hispanic consumers, as well as the secrets behind successful Spanish companies like Zara and Santander.
PODCAST EP. 016: COLLABORATION IS THE DEAL
With Tim Sanders by Terry Weaver
On this episode of “Making Elephants Fly,” Terry sits down with Internet Pioneer, Best-Selling Author, Keynote Speaker, Leader, and one of the best guys on the planet…Tim Sanders. Tim was an early stage member of Mark Cuban’s broadcast.com and later joined Yahoo where he rose to the position of Chief Solutions Officer and named its Leadership Coach. Tim’s past books include the New York Times best seller “Love Is The Killer App: How to Win Business & Influence Friends,” “The Likeability Factor,” and “Today We Are Rich: Harnessing the Power of Total Confidence.” Tim’s latest book “Dealstorming: The Secret Weapon That Can Solve Your Toughest Sales Challenges” unpacks the idea of how collaboration is secret to selling anything. Join Terry as he talks with Tim about the power of collaboration in building a life worth living and creating opportunities that you could have never created alone.
NEW Video by Michelle Ray on Leadership & Change!
A former media exec, Michelle Ray brings new strategies to manage change and shake up your organization in the war for talent.
One of her clients wrote: "Not only was I personally moved to action by your presentation, I was really pleased by all the positive feedback that I received from the attendees." Prudential Sussex Realty
Bring Michelle to your next event and watch your attendees thrive!